Self-Care November

 

Can you believe it's almost December?? I know I can't! If you follow me along on Instagram, you know that during the month of November I made it a goal to practice self-care every day of this month. Some days it was as small as just doing a 10 minute meditation or a face mask before bed, and other days it was spending a few hours alone in Starbucks or getting a pedicure. I made an effort to try some brand new things, as well as include a wide variety of things for myself - in both time and cost! (PLEASE check out my original post on IG for a little more of my thoughts back at the beginning of the month!) As someone who is an extrovert 90% of the time, I enjoy and feel filled by social events and connecting with friends - I NEED that! But only occasionally do I actually consider that "self-care". Sometimes it can be.

As I am searching for my "new identity" as a mom and a human (and have started to include therapy again in that journey) my therapist encouraged me during a session to really try to make self-care a priority. Following the session, I made an effort to keep self-care at the front of my mind as much as I could. After waking up one day and realizing that I had made it 9 WHOLE days in a row (starting Nov. 1) doing ONE thing for myself each day - I felt super motivated to continue and made it an actual goal to take it a step further and practice self care every single day during the entire month of November.

Here's my takeaway: IT. WAS. AWESOME. 

So there's the obvious: doing something for yourself clearly sounds good. Buh-duh. But the consistency I believe is what made it so awesome. Doing something (anything!) consistently removed the pressure for perfection. In the past, self-care happened for me so rarely that I would build the experience up in my head SO much. There was too much weight placed on ONE certain experience or that ONE pedicure or that ONE splurge or whatever it was. When it's not happening regularly, and when you don't know when you'll get another chance for yourself again, it actually makes it really hard to enjoy those times when you DO have an opportunity for self-care.

(I also want to add that I never felt like it was a burden or a chore trying to come up with something to do each day, but that part was actually really fun! Even my husband got into it and was super supportive. He would ask me what I wanted to do or encourage me to do something like take a bath or do a v-steam or go out of the house alone for a bit.)

I don't think you have to practice self-care every single day for an extended period of time to reap the benefits of it. (Do I think it's an awesome idea and everyone SHOULD try it? Absolutely!) And there IS something to be said for "forcing" yourself to practice self-care THAT frequently, as it opens up a lot of opportunities to try new things and get creative! BUT what I have learned is that consistency trumps frequency. I personally believe that when it comes to self-care it should be something that is practiced regularly. Whether it's every single day or just every Tuesday - when you know what to expect or know when time for yourself is coming again (and it's already on the horizon) it's okay if the experience/pedicure/coffee/meal is not 110% perfect. There is so much to be said for the stability and peace that I felt when I was making it happen regularly.

I feel happier. I feel like I matter more. My mental well-being IS a priority! Even if other people feel this way or tell you these things, it's difficult. to convince yourself of this. That's the hardest thing. I HOPE my little project has INSPIRED you to make yourself a priority. Not in a selfish way but in a "living a full life"kind of way. And if you're a mom (or a friend or sister or partner or whoever!) you can't pour into others if you yourself are empty. I can't fill my children if I have nothing to give. Wouldn't it be nice to actually FEEL that fulfillment? I still have a ways to go but this month of self-care has been a huge stepping stone for my personal journey to...wherever I'm going.

Here's a little list of what I did each day. (If you want MORE or want some visuals refer back to my Instagram and click on my "self-care" highlight! It's way more fun that way!!)

November 1: Went to a yoga class
November 2: Listened to a meditation on my phone before getting out of bed for the day
November 3: Took a bath (including candles, music and a book)
November 4: Vaginal steam with candles and calming music playing
November 5: Picked up some coffee, took the kids to the playground and listened to a podcast while I pushed Cami in the stroller and walked back and forth next to the jungle gym
November 6: Went to Starbucks alone after hubby got home from work to read/listen to a podcast/journal/write a blog post
November 7: Ate dinner on the couch with headphones in while hubby took care of feeding the kids at the table
November 8: Had a coffee date with a church friend/mentor
November 9: Laid in bed while the kids napped and played on my phone/checked social media/enjoyed the silence :)
November 10: Went to bed early and got 8 hours of sleep!
November 11: V-steam followed by a quiet bath
November 12: Woke up, put on a meditation and went back to sleep for 30 minutes
November 13: Spent the evening alone at Starbucks after therapy was cancelled
November 14: Laid in bed and read a book while Heidi was at school, Cami was napping and Wells got some iPad time
November 15: Mani/pedi followed by boxed brownie mix with some Andes mint chips thrown in
November 16: Rubbed my Eden's Garden "Anxiety Ease" essential oil on my wrist and laid down in bed while the kids napped. I put on a meditation and listened while I fell asleep.
November 17: Ran a half marathon (self-care was just making sure basic needs were met!)
November 18: Got my very first facial ever at a place I've been meaning to try for a while
November 19: Bought myself some new clothes while spending the day out of town with my sister! (Lots of alone time listening to music and podcasts in the car during the 2.5 hour drive to and from!)
November 20: Extra long mid-day v-steam with meditation while the kids napped
November 21: Put a few drops of essential oil on my wrists and laid down to rest. Not quite enough time to nap but still used the time to enjoy the quiet
November 22: 
November 23: Face mask before bed
November 24: Tried an "Aqua Massage" for the first time!
November 25: My birthday!
November 26: Quick 10 minute meditation
November 27: Therapy session (plus listened to a podcast in the car to and from the session)
November 28: Hair mask
November 29: Coffee and alone time at Starbucks while hubby handles bathtime/bedtime at home
November 30: V-steam followed by Mom's Night Out with friends