Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Big Sister Heidi




I thought I would write a short(ish) little post about how Heidi has adjusted to being a big sister and for those who are currently expecting baby #2 (or if you're just curious) a few things that we did to help her adjust to the change that I feel like made a difference. Obviously, personality plays a HUGE roll in how a toddler is going to adjust to adding a new family member, but I also believe that there are still a few things that we can do as parents to set them up for a successful transition... and maybe this makes a teeny tiny difference. Maybe not. Either way no one really has a choice heh heh. (Insert evil laugh.)

First of all, I will say that Heidi has done SO well with having a new baby brother. We really haven't had any jealousy issues, no increase in tantrums, she hasn't had any regression in being potty trained and still sleeps great... it has truly been a dream come true (and answered prayers for sure)! She loves him so much and she is so proud to be a big sister. The biggest issue we has was that I think Heidi started to get upset with being away from us. Clearly, she was not with us while we were in the hospital (except for a brief visit) and while Ryan & I were there she stayed with my in-laws. After 2 nights in the hospital, we came home with Wells and my in-laws brought Heidi back home. I think that if that had been the only time we had apart from her it would have been fine (as we have left her with my in-laws overnight countless times with zero issues) however, because Wells still had elevated bilirubin levels upon discharge, we had to take him to the doctor first thing in the morning. Long story short, it ended up being a HUGE wild goose chase and we ended up having to be going most of the day again. We came home late that afternoon, about the same time we had gotten home from the hospital the night before. Still at this point, everything seemed fine. Sometime within the next few days, my mother in law came back over to our house to visit and Heidi started freaking for no apparent reason. After a few minutes, we realized that it was probably because she thought that we were leaving her again. Once we came to that conclusion, we assured her that Mommy and Daddy weren't going anywhere and that we were all staying home. Once my mother in law left, Heidi was okay again (sorry Ryan's mom!!) That was literally the only freak out that she had over anything baby-related.

Before Wells' Arrival

Prior to bringing Wells home, we really talked up the baby thing. We tried to get a specific and simple as possible so that Heidi could understand as best as she could what was going to happen. We talked about how the baby will have eyes and a nose and fingers and toes. We encouraged her to think about what she would do when the baby was here - hold is hand, tickle his toes, give him his pacifier if he's crying, give him kisses on the cheek, etc. We also talked about different things that would happen once he was here - how he would cry sometimes, how he will need his diaper changed, and so on. She liked talking about all of these things. She also (thankfully) got really into the baby doll thing while I was pregnant. Not all kids get into that, so I was grateful that she enjoyed it. We would take care of the baby doll, feed her, burp her (which Heidi found hilarious) rocked the baby to sleep and more. Heidi loved being a little mama to her baby doll, who's name was "Baby Dolly" (haha). We also bought the book "I am a Big Sister". Heidi is all about the books so she loved this.

After Wells' Came Home

Once Wells was at home, we really tried to stick to the "usual" routine as much as possible (at least as far as Heidi was concerned). Especially after her episode when my mother in law came over, I realized that just being WITH us for sure needed to be a priority. We tried to keep as MUCH as we could the same. For example, Ryan is usually the one to give Heidi a bath at night, so we made sure that didn't change. Now, I certainly was not capable of this after my birth with Heidi, but after Wells I felt very much okay (physically, emotionally, mentally...) going to the grocery store. 5 days postpartum I was pushing Heidi in a cart around the grocery store just like usual. Just the two of us. Taking time together while Ryan was still off of work was also a huge advantage. I took Heidi to our bi-monthly playgroup just the 2 of us as well. Just like normal. Taking time out for both Ryan and I to spend individually with Heidi (I think? I hope!) helped her with the transition and hopefully brought her comfort and helped to retain some sort of sense of normalcy. We also would try to take advantage of time with her whenever (if ever) Wells was napping or went to bed. We would let her stay up a little bit past her bedtime to spend some extra time with Mommy and Daddy. Even just making sure that we were being so intentional with our time with her when Wells WAS awake and chillin in his swing or pack n play.

I hope this is helpful to anyone else out there looking to ease into that transition when bringing baby home from the hospital! We have really enjoyed the transition from 1 to 2 and it really only took a few days before we felt like we had always had 2! I am so proud of Heidi for the big sister that she has become and for how well she has transitioned to adding a new member to our family. She has done better than I could have dreamed of and I love seeing how she loves him with her whole heart.

Meeting her new baby brother in the hospital. She was SO excited to hold him
and was so cute - she pointed out his eyes, and nose and his hat and
that he was blowing some spit bubbles haha.

Snuggles.

She loves holding him and most nights asks to hold him before bed.





She likes to participate in Wells' monthly photos. I usually let her have a turn
and then have her step out for Wells' turn. This is usually fairly peaceful as
long as she has her turn in the spotlight obvi.

More hugs and snuggles.



Holding hands haha! 

Letting Wells talk on the (play) phone.

He puts up with a lot.

She loves him. Too much sometimes. Tiny Toons Elvira style. But she loves him.



Thursday, September 1, 2016

Month 5 - Wells

Month 5: Baby!



Age: 5 months
Weight: 17ish lbs maybe? This is a total guess bc I forgot to weigh him...
Major calendar events: Engagement party for Aunt Jennifer and Uncle Sheldon!
Milestones: Went on our first run together, found his feet, he has started laughing and "talking" a lot more and even though he's been doing this for a while I finally witnessed him rolling over!
Sleep: 4 month sleep regression has NOT been nice to us. We had one solid month of amazing through-the-night sleeping, and then right when he turned 4 months old Wells started waking up again in the middle of the night. Usually once and usually to eat! It's been rough going back to the interrupted sleep every night thing, especially because I feel like we hadn't quite recovered from the initial lack of sleep that occurrs during the first 8-12 weeks. We definitely feel like it's still too early to let him cry it out, so for now he'll continue to get his "midnight" snack ;). 
Likes: His sister, smiling, the exersaucer, chewing on everything
Dislikes: Not much really...
Best moment: Obviously our first run together was one of my favorites, I'm so glad I finally actually SAW him roll over! And of course I love watching Heidi and Wells interact. I can tell by the way that he looks at her that he just loves her so much!
Eating: 100% breastfed every 3-4 hours and still spitting up EXCESSIVELY (but never seems to be bothered by it.)


Here are some pictures from this month!



Buddy couldn't quite make it through dinner...







Usual morning routine

Sitting on Baby Mitchell

Target run!

First run together!